Even if you haven’t read the latest writings of Steve Krug, Jakob Nielsen or Luke Wroblewski, it doesn’t take a ‘Jesus Christ Rubber Duck’ to understand that church speak and clique-chat only help relegate your site into the realms search engine obscurity.
Posts under ‘Jesus Junk’
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 4 – Unreadable at 11:23
If conversion rates are the metric by which we measure successful web page adoption, then the antithesis of that is product abandonment. Today’s example shows how something as intuitive as a wall clock was made unreadable at 11:23.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 3 – Avoid Wipeouts
Nothing says “wipe-out” like a cheap little Holy Bible eraser. And nothing spells disaster like having all your valuable data turn into techno-mush. Here’s some tips to avoid this.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 2 – Think Globally!
As once again the TSA reminds us that Christmas Snow Globes a threat to National Security, I thought it might be a good time to talk about the wide-World of bad-guys and some simple things you can do to guard your site from a potentially explosive situation.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 1 – Hallway Testing
Learn how to cheaply and quickly avoid ‘accidental-message-myopia’ syndrome – like inadvertently creating a design that asserts an Aryan baby Jesus.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 12 – Santa with Baby Jesus Nativity(ies)
12 Santa with Jesus figurines. A confusing little mix of Madison Avenue imagery with legal historic details is an excellent object lesson in why we need to be careful about semantics in a different light: semantic HTML.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 11 – Happy Birthday Jesus Tattoos
Yes folks, everyone knows your kids will be different like everyone else wearing their “Happy Birthday Jesus” tattoos. They also serve as a perfect object lesson on 11 blogging mistakes pastors & laypersons make when they leave nothing but a world of markup, rather than a mark on the world.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 10 – Moses Action Figure
On the 10th day of kitschmas my webmaster threw down on me – 10 Moses Action Figures (all clutching tablets of the 10 commandments in their patented kung-fu grip!). The perfect reminder to remember 10 Commandments of Church Website Search Engine Optimization.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 9 – 9″ Plush Long Arm Religious Gorillas
I think the colorful string of hominidae hangers gives us an excellent object lesson to those new to church website design: Don’t go ape over new technologies just for the sake of implementing them! Here are some wretched examples, from memory, I’ve encountered where the church webmaster made a monkey out of their website with some new gizmo or gadget they encountered:
*
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 8 – Elvis Christmas 8 Track Tape
Even though the tunes on the Elvis 8 track are timeless, who is going to hear them now? Likewise with your church website. Just because the message of the Gospel is ageless doesn’t mean the same applies to the data and technologies used to convey your organizations web presence.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 7 – Walking With Jesus Playing Cards
On the 7th day of Jesus Junk my webmaster equipped me with everything I needed to take a good beating during a youth ministry Texas Hold’em lock in with a pack of Walking With Jesus’ Playing Cards. And speaking of betting the house, let’s complain a bit about all Flash websites – as like gambling, it seems there are quite a few church webmaster addicted to this plugin.
12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 6 – Jesus Saves Goose Leg Bands
How you convey your church or charity’s message is as important as what you say. Case in point, the Christmas Kitsch otherwise known as the ‘unique “Jesus Saves” goose leg band’ … available on E-Bay for $12.99! Compare this ill-gotten approach with your church website conversion goals.
