Heal Your Church WebSite

Teaching, rebuking, correcting & training in righteous web design.

12 Days of Jesus Junk – Day 9 – 9″ Plush Long Arm Religious Gorillas

9 inch Plush Long Arm Religious GorillasOn the 9th day of Christmas my webmaster gave to me, a 9″ Plush Long Arm Religious Gorilla!

Oh how I wish I were making this one up today. I mean talk about a John 11:35 moment – what in the name of all that’s Christmas does a day-glow colored gorilla have to do with anything related to the birth, life and death of our Savior?

That said, I think the colorful string of hominidae hangers do at least offer us an excellent object lesson to those new to church website design:

Don’t go ape over new technologies just for the sake of implementing them!

Here are 9 wretched examples, from memory, I’ve encountered where the church webmaster made a monkey out of their website with some new gizmo or gadget they encountered:

  1. gratuitous flash animations & navigation
  2. cursed cursor trailers
  3. spinning animated crosses
  4. page swipes & animated marquees
  5. dhtml snowflakes drifting down the screen
  6. pop-up and pop-under windows
  7. cursed cursor trailers
  8. disabled right-click
  9. rainbow colored dividers & title text

Please don’t do this. Yes they effects are all cool … for about the first five seconds, after that, they tend to drive your users away.

Remember, just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. That is, don’t be afraid to use various technologies, just make sure there is a legitimate need.

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